Traveling Gloves

The cold icy snow clung to me on the outside while the hands held me on the inside. After several hours plunging into the snow, I was drenched through and through. With no heat and left behind, the nightly cold temperatures started to drop. Being outside all night long gave no relief to the coldness inside and out. As the sun rose offering no more than a few degrees change, the chill and heavy dampness surrounded every ounce of fiber.

When the movement started, the wind wasn't too bad. It was the icy rain water kicking up from behind ending any chance of dryness. Then the movement stopped, but the icy rain didn't. Relief was granted when I was finally picked up and put inside.

This was the adventure of Child #3's gloves. Traveling on the back bumper of my truck this morning, I discovered the gloves after I got to work. Having children is an adventure along with occasional entertainment.

Life's an adventure. Live it up. Have a great weekend!

Early Christmas Presents

Through tireless efforts to get through the day, the Handyman and I fell asleep on the couch after I thought I had put the girls to bed. I know it sounds all sweet until the sounds of feet and giggling wake me up. By the time I reached my bedroom, the feet had scattered and the lights were off except for my bedroom.

The scene of the crime was left with all of my shoes pulled out of my closet and possibly worn. The covers and sheets to my bed were pulled back as if someone or many someones had slept in it. Finally, several bags were disturbed that contained Christmas gifts I had tucked behind the chair.

Lining up the pretend sleeping suspects, I threaten to take all gifts back to the store. On second thought, I threaten to keep all the gifts for myself and they can watch me enjoy using their presents.

Yay! Early Christmas presents for me. I'm not actually going to do this, but you have to admit it's a good threat.

Fully Integrated

You know you're fully integrated into the workforce when your website girl resigns, a current event needs to be addressed on the website along with emails to drive traffic to the website, and the entire process defaults to you.

After you accomplish the whole process in less than a twenty-four hour window, you wake up on Saturday morning at 4:30 AM in a panic that all the links are broken on the website. I checked website. All is good. At least now I'll be able to train the new hire thoroughly on how to manage our website content. Check out my do-it-yourself content management www.4lpi.com. The loss of a great humanitarian, Nelson Mendela.

Enjoy your weekend!

Fashionable Pain

Out of all my children, Child #3 is the most patient. Though she has moments of impatience, she is by far the winner in our family. She has been inquiring about getting her ears pierced for over a year. My response last year was "You'll have to wait for your birthday." Well, her birthday was in April. I didn't exactly fulfill the promise. Every time she would remind me, I had an excuse.

"You can't get your ears pierced during the soccer season." (Rule: no jewelry while playing)

The Spring soccer season came and went. Then Summer appeared.

"You're going to be too active and you won't be able to keep them cleaned properly."

Then the Fall soccer season caught us.

"You'll have to wait until after the soccer season again."

I know my excuses are completely unfair, but it comes down to our lives are busy and a little bit of laziness on my part. There is a lot of maintenance when you get your ears pierced. I don't want to have to remind her twice a day for six weeks to clean and twist the earrings. There are already twenty other things I have to constantly repeat throughout the day. It's exhausting.

Since soccer season has ended, I don't have anymore excuses so I finally fulfilled her birthday present. Considering Child #3 has been driving this crusade, Child #1 and Child #2 are going along for the ride (they never expressed an interest in getting their ears pierced before). So off to the mall we go. 

All three excitedly pick out the earrings they wanted. Love how the ear piercing is free, but the earrings are approximately fifty dollars each.

Child #3 wants to go first. She hops into the chair. The technician does all the necessary things. Child #3 doesn't even want her to count. She just wants her to punch the hole. The sound of one quick punch silences our posse waiting for Child #3's reaction. As her mother, I can tell it wasn't pain free for her, but she held a straight face and was ready for the other ear. She says they feel warm, but it didn't hurt.

Child #2 hops up on the chair. The technician gets her situated and punches the first hole. All the color drained from her face and her mouth contorted into a painful ow. Child #2 braved through the second hole punch, but wasn't exactly happy about it. She hops off the chair and is happy she got her ears pierced once the temporary pain has gone away.

As we all turn to Child #1, she is shaking her head no and slowly stepping away from the area. The protesting begins. Shoot, I should've made her go first. She has made up her mind that she does not want her ears pierce anymore and refuses to get on the chair.

We all try to sweet talk into it, but nothing we say is working. Then I try to guilt her into it (no refunds). That doesn't work. Then her Aunt tries to bribe her. Nope. Nothing. We're at a stand still. Fortunately, there was a twenty-one year old girl waiting for her turn. We let her go in front of Child #1. Though this girl was getting four holes, she had just the right personality to entertain Child #1 enough to make her relax. The girl was extremely funny. After the girl got her first two earrings in, she wanted a break. Child #1 lightened up and sat in the chair.

Child #1 wanted me to hold her hand so I stood next to her while the technician prepped her. Once everything was in place, Child #1 wanted the technician to count to three. We all held our breath while the hole was punched. Child #1 instantly turned to me with a scrunched brow and says, "That's it. That didn't hurt." Our posse all busted out laughing. So the technician quickly punched the other hole and we were done. Child #1is tougher than she realizes. Then we stayed to watch the girl get her other two earrings in. We were all entertained.

So now we wait six weeks. The true test will be if they can keep up with the cleaning maintenance. The goal is not to get any infected ears. I'll keep you posted. 

I have to say it was all worth it to see their big happy smiles when it was all done.

Peer Pressure

Through my adult years, I've prided myself for never stepping foot into a Starbucks ever (I had to Google the history of Starbucks discovering Starbucks started in 1971-I would've never guessed that one). That even goes with never purchasing a single item from Starbucks (not even a gift card for someone else). Most of you aren't surprised by this statement, but maybe you'll be surprised by the next statement. I made several purchases from Starbucks this past week due to meeting up with others while I was in San Francisco. Apparently in San Francisco a Starbucks is located on almost every corner. Since I was there, I decided to go ahead and make a purchase.

Since I'm not fluent in coffee shop terms, I defaulted to a Chai Tea Latte because the pressure to decide on something different was too overwhelming for me. Plus it's hard to justify trying out something new when it costs $4.50 a cup. Granted I could've purchased a simple coffee, but I do enjoy Chai Tea a lot at home. I have to admit their Chai Tea Latte is awesome and addictive.

Now the question is will I continue to make those purchases at home. The cost is a huge hurdle for me. I can't justify spending that much on a cup of tea everyday when I can make it at home for a fraction of the cost. I guess the penny pitcher in me is showing in this blog post, but we all have priorities on where our money is spent. Mine is just not coffee or tea.

Enjoy your choices!

Risky Business

I think I've discovered the perfect time to go to the grocery store when I can wear my sweats and safely not run into anyone.

Once your children enter into the mainstream educational system, you're exposure to community visibility increases. Tested by a few of my friends and of course me. We've discovered no matter where you go within your community, you run into someone you know or someone you recognize from your child's school. With this observation, there is no more running errands around town in your favorite grubby sweats. Not to mention, you're not the cute twenty-two year old that could pull off the lazy Saturday look without looking like a homeless person anymore.

Needless to say, the best time so far to go to the grocery store is on Monday night at 7:30 PM in the lovely community I live in. There was absolutely no one at our local grocery store this past Monday night. Another bonus, I managed to complete my grocery shopping within a record time of thirty minutes. I will have to test this next week to see if a pattern will develop. I will keep you posted.

Enjoy comfortable sweat wearing shopping!

Unexpected Sinker

Well the fall soccer season has ended. To celebrate this wonderful time, I booked a weekend at an indoor waterpark at the Wisconsin Dells. Two nights at a waterpark is probably too much for me, but I booked this during the height of the Fall soccer season and I might've been a little delirious at the time. I needed some kind of goal to pull me through. Our soccer schedule can get pretty intense. More like consume our lives for eight weeks every Fall and Spring. Needless to say, I'm burnt out by the end.

Anyway we made it through the first night and into the next day having a fun little family vacation. On our final evening and last chance to swim, we take the girls to the swimming pool. For the most part, they have exhaustively done all the slides and just want to swim and goof around in the main pool. No problem for me. I was getting tired of climbing all the stairs anyway. They were entertaining themselves in the pool so I decided to get out and take a break. As I sit watching my kids, I notice the lifeguard grab his walkie-talkie and walk to the opposite side of the pool . He crouches downs and inspects something at the bottom of the pool. I immediately yell for the girls to get out of the pool. Other employees show up trying to evacuate the pool.

Yep you guessed, it was a solid chuck at the bottom of the pool. This really pissed me off. The waterpark had a baby section with a zero depth and fun little slides specifically for babies who were required to wear a swim diaper. Granted, I am completely speculating it was the baby that was in the pool because the turd was too small to be a big kid turd. In conclusion, there should be rules about allowing babies in the big kid pool. Obviously, this ruined the rest of the swim time for my kids because there was no more big pool to swim in. Though they compensated by going to the lazy river and bopping around there and still having fun, I still feel (now that my kids are older, I know it's bias) should be no babies allowed in the big kid pool especially when a baby pool is provided.

I guess this is my complaint for parents who don't pay attention to their kids especially with the poop cues. I always knew when my kids were doing their business. It's not that hard to figure out.

Enough about poop and go enjoy a poop free pool somewhere!

Buzz Word Poetry

As a fully integrated member in the workforce, I developed the strategy to accomplish the goals.

Leveraging my skills to implement the strategy, I'm leading the thought leadership into forward thinking to pave the way toward increase growth.

Along the journey to successful results, I'm challenged with developing solutions to solve problems that are beyond the market scope leading me into an unexpected environment of gamification.   

Gamification is a word. If you don't believe me, Google it.

Share with your friends and have a wonderful weekend!

Perceptive Observer

Due to some alternate scheduling, we ended up with a Saturday without any soccer games. With this unusual break, I declared a deep cleaning day. It's been awhile, but  I have a hard enough time keeping up with the basics like dishes, laundry, and vacuuming. I didn't realize how long it's been until Child #2 started complaining, "You're not doing anything, but wiping down surfaces and things. That's not really cleaning."

 After listening to her continual diatribe, it occurred to me that I don't dust very often. Apparently, my children don't associate cleaning with dusting because I rarely do it. So I spent the morning dusting and moving furniture vacuuming the entire house. At least my house will be clean for a day. Dust is only visible if you acknowledge it. I just choose not to acknowledge it very often.

I'll schedule the next dusting in another two months and make sure Child #2 is home while I dust. Maybe I'll even volunteer Child #2 to dust for me. 

Possible World Record

I know I've been out of the workforce for awhile, but there's still a level of expectation for fancy hotels in my mind. Yes. I'm out of town on a business trip stuck at a conference in a fancy hotel in Dallas. Not exactly a prime vacation spot. Though the weather is beautiful and refreshing, I'm mostly stuck indoors. During a restroom break, I turn to send the water down the unknown path to the sewer. I look up noticing the ceilings are high and there is a ledge with lighting shining at the ceiling illuminating a gigantic...

daddy long legs spider. I'm pretty sure it was triple the size of the one in the photo to the left. I know it was in an odd location, but I expected a little more from a fancy hotel. Especially since he looked like he had made a home for himself and I had seen him two days in a row. It was a little creepy. Maybe Texas just has bigger daddy long leg spiders than Wisconsin. I swear it could've been a world record size spider.


Have a great day!

Grapes

According to Wikipedia, "the process of fermentation in winemaking turns grape juice into an alcoholic beverage. During fermentation, yeasts interact with sugars in the juice to create ethanol, commonly known as ethyl alcohol, and carbon dioxide (as a by-product). In winemaking, the temperature and speed of fermentation are important considerations as well as the levels of oxygen present is a must at the start of the fermentation. The risk of stuck fermentation and the development of several wine faults can also occur during this stage, which can last anywhere from 5 to 14 days for primary fermentation and potentially another 5 to 10 days for a secondary fermentation. Fermentation may be done in stainless steel tanks, which is common with many white wines like Riesling, in an open wooden vat, inside a wine barrel and inside the wine bottle itself as in the production of many sparkling wines."

Grapes

Check

Over 95 degree inside car temperature

Check

5 to 14 days

Check

Small plastic container hidden under the back seat

Check

The last part of the process is where my children failed the winemaking recipe experiment. Since there was no stainless steal vat or wooden barrel, the carbon dioxide by-product escaped the plastic container filling the inside of my car with a lovely, putrid smell of fermenting grapes. 

Insanity at the highest level...well at least for the Midwest

In between four soccer games this weekend, the Handyman and I completed the Tough Mudder course along with some friends. For those who don't know what Tough Mudder is, it's a 11.8 mile run/obstacle course including water, mud, fire, and occasional electrical shock obstacles. My favorite obstacle is shown below. What a thrill!

Anyway, I brow-beated the Handyman into doing this with me. If he was telling this story, he would probably tell you I threatened to divorce him if he didn't participate. It's my story so I deny any threats.

Though running isn't the Handyman's thing (he hasn't ran since high school when he used to play soccer), I still needed him to participate to help with the obstacles. My upper body strength has declined as I've gotten older, but he still has an unnatural ability to leap human size hay bales, push my body up over a two story wall, and carry another human (I'm that human) while running a 50 yard dash. Which leads me to believe if you combined his strength and my running endurance into one person, we would be the ultimate competitor (we have hope for our children). As much as he complained about the running (more like a combination of jogging and walking), I have to give him credit for completing the whole course with me. He admitted after it was all done he had fun. Not that he would ever do it again he still had fun. I had fun too! He even admitted that my friend and I were tough. Hooah!

Though I had fun, I have to tell you I thought the course was poorly set up. For the first six miles, there was probably only one big obstacle. Now to be fair it was raining and they did shut down a big obstacle due to lightening (understandable). All of the really cool obstacles were at the end when you were the most tired, muddy, and soaked. I would've liked to have seen them evenly spread out throughout the course. The other disappointment was that they repeated some of the smaller obstacles. Once you do one obstacle, you don't want to repeat it. You want a new challenge. A lot of other participants thought the same as us. Either way the outcome was good, no one in our group got hurt and we had fun.

What was harder the marathon or Tough Mudder?  Definitely the marathon.

Would I do Tough Mudder again?  Probably not. Once was good enough. Another check off the bucket list.

Hooah!

Runaway Thoughts

Sometime during the early morning dark.

Drawer opens, Handyman states, "I think I'm getting low on clean shirts."

I pull my drawer open, "Huh, look at that I'm low on clean shirts too. I guess we'll have to fire the maid."

Handyman, "Or get a new one."

Now during this fun little banter, at first, I thought oh maybe he's suggesting we hire a maid. Of course, then I thought about it for another second, in my never ending analytical mind, is he saying he wants a new wife? My internal conversation turns to the nasty side. If he wants his clothes done on a timely manner, then he can do them himself. At that point, I was ready to throw down. Then I realize he's a man and men don't have the ability to have seven different layers of meaning to one statement. My internal conversation turns back to rational. He was just trying to be funny.

Laundry is a vicious cycle and I really, really, really, really dislike the chore.

Monkeying Around

 Who said girls are physically easier than boys? Imagine waking up to girls literally climbing the walls-a true monkey at heart. Not sure where this idea came from, but it's driving me crazy. Yeah, someone should put that girl in gymnastics. Oh wait, she is. Now what should I do?
 

Me, Myself, and I

So this is what it's like to be alone at home on a week night. The children are gone and the Handyman is out of town for the evening. The quietness is heavenly. Ahhh...paradise.

No rushing around to make dinner for hungry demanding children or to do the dishes immediately after dinner or to have three kids speaking to me at the same time about various subjects. Though I leisurely did some laundry, went for a jog, showered without any interruption, and now writing in my neglected blog, I believe this is better than a few hour long massage or meditation. What a stress reliever to not have to worry about anyone else for the night. 

All the credit goes to my wonderful, newly retired parents that have taken on three over-energized girls for the evening. I'm sure there will be some kind of sainthood down the road. A big thanks goes out to them.

Enjoy your evening!

Back-to-School Highlights

It's back to school shopping time. Yay! (watch out the sarcasm is burning the page, read quick)

I'm trying to make it through all the chaos during this wonderful time of the summer. The dreadful routine preparing for the beginning of the school year that includes:

•     School registration

•     School supplies purchase for 3 children

•     And of course-school clothes for three completely different styled children

Since Child #1 has gone from being a kid to a teenage over night (this is not supposed to happen at 10 years old), I decide to take her clothes shopping without her sisters-not to mention her sisters were at soccer practice. It's basically a logistic thing now shopping for clothes between the children. She's in the XS sizes for the Junior Department (she's growing like a weed-height is passed my shoulder with a full shoe size larger than my foot at the tender age of 10). Great one-on-one attention too except I find myself repeating the same phrase over and over in the Juniors Department. It goes something like this:

"No, those are crotch shorts."

"Absolutely not, those are crotch shorts too."

At what point did the clothes designer think crotch shorts were good for anyone? Seriously!

Anyway, I digress. Actually, there might not be a point to this post so the digression might continue to fall.

Now it's time to take Child #2 and #3 to the store for clothes. At this point, I've already purchased all the school supplies, 1 kid's school clothes, and one registration/orientation down so I'm almost seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. Child #1 is out with her dad so we have the perfect opportunity to knock off all the school clothes that are needed. Venturing to the store, the mood is happy and excited. Clothes are being picked out. Now choices have to be made. The mood is slipping. Choices are getting harder to eliminate, but all clothes have been chosen and agreed upon. The mood is okay until the begging for jewelry presents itself. Child #3 wanted one of those best friend half heart necklaces that you give to a friend so you can each have half a heart around your neck. Originally, I said no. Then Child #2 wanted one, but they both wanted to buy one and share with a friend. I'm against this display of best friends amongst other children so I said no again to both. After several whining pleas, I said okay, but on one condition. Child #2 and Child #3 would have to share the necklace with each other. I would not buy it for other friends. This is where the emotions exploded and Child #2's mood ends at the bottom. Child #3 was good with it so I let her pick out the necklace, which concluded our shopping and we headed toward the check outline. Ignoring Child #2's anger and failure to walk with us to the front of the store. Though I checked several times that she was stalking behind us in between the clothes and other aisles.  

Child #3 and I walk up to a line to check out (store was pretty busy). Waiting patiently, a lady with a cart full of stuff steps in front of me cutting in line. Even with all the craziness from Child #2, I smile and keep my cool. I wasn't in a rush. Then the lady in front of the lady that cut me off, yells "Mom hurry up I'm almost to the register." Now the mom pulls up with an overloaded cart of stuff. Again, I kept my cool. No problem for me, but the lady who cut me off is shaking her head and mumbling. I bust out laughing (maybe it was more of a chuckle, but in my head I'm rolling on the floor laughing). Suddenly, a new register opens and the lady who cut me off doesn't move so I take the opportunity to move up to the open line and check out. I felt good about myself. I hadn't lost it through the whole shopping experience. As Child #3 and I are walking out the door, I don't see Child #2 anywhere. We continue on. I figure she'll eventually follow. We get to the car and still no Child #2. Child #3 (knows her sister too well) says, "Should we pretend to leave?"

"Hopefully, she'll be able to find her way home by walking," I say. As soon as I back up the car, Child #2 is running toward the car. The look on her face isn't even close to being sunshine and roses. I stop the car and she gets in. Crying and yelling at me how mean of a mother I am. I shrugged my shoulders and laugh. Then something hits me in the back of the head. Now this is where I loose it. Granted it was only a pair of socks (they both brought a pair of socks to try on shoes), but I flipped out (of course, she wins because she got a reaction out me). I am almost, fairly certain she will never throw anything again at me. Calling her out on her brattiness, selfishness, and her single minded world, opened her eyes a little especially since I just spent a fortune on clothes for her. By the time we made it home, she was remorseful and apologized to me and her sister.

Not sure if there is a moral to this story except for I hate despise school shopping (the rule is not to use hate in our household)..

Favorite Movie Lines

"Shut your mouth when you're talking to me!"

"You have a baby...in a bar."

"You can't handle the truth!"

Big bear. Big bear. Big bear!

"I had no idea you could milk a cat."
"Oh yeah, you can milk anything with nipples."
"I have nipples, Greg. Could you milk me?"

This is ridiculous. It's crazy. I feel like I'm babysitting, except I'm not getting paid. 

Nobody leaves this place without singing the blues. 

What's your favorite movie line?

Elusive Small Forks

Last year, I had to buy another set of silverware because the small forks have mysteriously disappeared. Now that I have two sets of large forks, large spoons, small spoons, and knives, my silverware trays are overflowing. Throughout the year the trays have consistently remained the same except for, yes you guessed it, the small forks. The elusive forks have slowly disappeared again.

I think I need a new plan. I can only speculate where the forks are going. Maybe I should look into buying just small forks next time.

Legal Rule Breaker

With some  responsibility, comes over confidence.

Of course, I know Child #2 is always going to push the boundaries no matter what the rules are. Again the challenge is always going to be to try to keep those boundaries on the right side of the law. What we have going for us right now is that Child #2 does understand right from wrong and that she has compassion for others (most of the time).

So the summer has started out with Child #2 riding her bike with Child #3 up and down our street without supervision. Since we don't have any sidewalks and our street we live on is a narrow, hilly, curvy lake road, I've been fairly overprotective in the past. This summer, I've given them a little slack where they can ride their bikes. They can ride down to the park without me (as long as at least two of them stay together at all times) and I've allowed them to ride up the street to a friend's house about ten houses away from ours.

Naturally this distance wasn't going to be enough for Child #2. After a few rides to the friend's house, she came home to tell me that her and Child #3 made it all the way to the speed hump zone on our road (this is approximately a half mile away from our house). I didn't want to squash her enthusiasm or her confidence to make a decision on her own so I kept my opinions to myself.

I mentioned that I also have let them go down to the park by themselves as long as they stayed together. The park is actually closer than the friend's house, but there is more traffic and more people around (made me a little more nervous). They would go down to swing on the swings and play on the playground. The main rules were not to talk to strangers and no swimming at the beach. After a few successful bike rides down to the park, I thought this was great. I have to admit I loved their new found independence. It gave me some extra time to catch up on housework.

To Child #2's credit, she stuck to the rules. But...I know you were waiting for it...Child #2 decided that she would take her new found freedom to the next level. To Child #2 and Child #3's credit, they were able to keep a secret for a few weeks. Long story, short, Child #2 and Child #3 were buying soda from the vending machine down at the park. The crazy part is that Child #3 doesn't even like soda, but apparently she likes Mountain Dew.

I completely forgot about the vending machine so now the rules have extended to no buying soda down at the park. Note to self: Don't forget to enforce the no soda rule. 

Unexpected Bundle

Apparently, there is some kind of balance in the universe. Since I have three daughters, the universe decided to give me three nephews. Just to make this clear, no I'm not pregnant (almost impossible), but my older brother and his wife are adding to the population. Congratulations to them! This is my third nephew and first grand-boy-child on my side. 

Oh, Little Baby Boy what I will have to share with you. First things first, stay in there as along as possible. The heavy expectations that come with your last name will only come too soon. Enjoy the solitude.